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http://www.nochucknorris.com/Chuck Norris turns his grass emo so that is cuts itself
Chuck Norris made a bet with Hulk: Whoever loses at armwrestling paints himself green
Chuck Norris played who will blick first with a mirror. And he won
Some magicians can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No-one fools with Chuck Norris
Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience
Chuck Norris can sit in the corner of a circular room
Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless telephone
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse on the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down
Chuck Norris can light a fire with two ice-cubes together.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen, oxygen needs Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once roudhoused kicked Hulk in the face. Now he hides in the forest and changed his name to Shrek
The Universe is not expanding. Its running away from Chuck Norris.